Message From David

Dear Blog Readers,
It is hard for me to put into words what the interest and concern from each of you has meant to Sheri and to me. There was such meaning and support expressed to us with every entry. We read comments from so many people - close friends and those who we didn't really know very well - and it strengthened us. This blog allowed family and friends to participate in this journey and be inspired by Sheri's strength, but at a comfortable distance.
Have you ever cried so much that your eyes are just dry? Well, that's how I have felt sometimes over the past few months. My emotions were so raw at times that I couldn't always read the blog, but every time I did, I drew strength from you. Thank you all for your love and support.
Sincerely,
David Faught

Funeral Information

Sheri's funeral will be held at 10:00 a.m. on Thursday, November 19, 2009. It will be at the LDS church, 750 W. Richards St. in Fallon.

November 13, 2009

Today Sheri's earthly journey ended. Although she is gone, her positive influence will be felt in our lives as we have become better for having known her. During her illness, we all drew strength from her positive attitude in the face of such adversity. Our prayers are with her family during this time.

Friday

I had the stent surgery yesterday, as scheduled. I came right home and went to sleep. I am very weak and tired and I'm sleeping a lot. It is too early for me to know how the new positioning of these drains is working.
I am almost unable to talk on the phone and visitors are really hard to have right now. I know many people are praying for me and I thank you for those prayers.

Monday

It is another day and I am still having a lot of pain, which I have come to expect. It is hard to tell, but I think it is worse today than even a few days ago. I have spent some time resting and some time up today. I am still scheduled to go in for the surgery to redo my stents on Thursday. David thinks I'm too weak to have it, and can see his point, I am pretty weak right now. But if the doctors will let me, I'm inclined to do it. I don't know, things change from day to day. We'll see what this week brings.

Saturday

Things are a lot the same for me as far as my pain goes; I still have the same bad back pain. A few months ago, someone gave me a walker with four wheels. I put it away thinking I would never need something like that. Well, the day has arrived that using it actually helps me get around a little easier. I am trying to use it go just walk around the house because I know I need the movement for my legs and back. David got me some gel pads that I am going to try to ease some of my back pain. I think it will give me a little more cushioning. I'm not sure how they'll work, but I'm going to try them out.

I am scheduled to go in this Thursday to St. Marys for another round of surgery. I am supposed to get my blood tests done sometime before then, so that it what the upcoming week looks like for me. Thank you all for the kind thoughts and prayers.

Monday

Today has been fine, the medication handles my abdominal pain pretty well, but it is the back pain that is hard to get a handle on. It has been worse today and I spend a lot of my day just trying to endure it. I sleep when I can which is nice because I don't feel the pain. My mom came here today to spend the day with me. It is good to have her help and company. I know there are many people who ask about me and pray for me and I want to thank you for that. I really appreciate it.

Back Pain

Things have been pretty uneventful here for the past few days, but yesterday my pain really started to get worse. It was a pretty tough day. The doctor upped my pain medication and it has been better today. I had a nice visit with a friend who rubbed my back while we visited. It helps the back pain, and I thought it felt good enough that I would be able to rest afterward, but when the massage stopped, the pain came back. I did not nap today, and I am hoping I will sleep tonight. Some nights I can sleep, others I am up a lot.

I got my results from my last blood test and my bili count was 13. That is pretty high and Dr. Abrass said that I can't have chemo with a count that high. He also said that there is really nothing he can do for me. The week after next I will go into St. Mary's to have these stents redone. Other than that, I don't have anything medical scheduled.

I have had some delicious food brought in this week, thank you to everyone for such yummy food and for the kindness shown to my family and me.

Out of Bed

I have felt pretty good today, which is a whole lot better than I felt a few days ago. I have tried to stay out of the bedroom. I spent three days in my bed and I don't care to spend much more time in there than I have to right now. I have been in the chair and on the couch in the living room. It's not as comfortable as my bed, but I really don't want to be in my bed. I enjoyed a visit from a friend and I spent some time watching TV. I have been watching these cake decorating shows that are pretty amazing. I especially appreciated being at home instead of in the hospital today, since I was scheduled to be in there today.

No Surgery

Today has been about the same for me with the pain in my back and abdomen. I went ahead and increased the amount of pain medication I am taking, but I am still feeling about the same level of pain.

I am not going to my surgery appointment on Monday. My right side is draining like it should and the stitches are holding up well and not pulling out at all. I think I can wait three more weeks and go in when I am scheduled to have all of these redone. I had my blood tests done on Friday, but I didn't get any results yet. I'm pretty yellow, so I don't know what think about my bili count. Thank you for the prayers, I appreciate them!

Draining

Today has been a really bad day for my pain. It's strange how it had been getting a little better each day and then take such a turn for the worse today. It is so bad in my back and abdomen. It cramps up so that I can hardly move. I am doing what I can to manage the pain, but I know this is part of the progression of this disease.

On a brighter note, last night I looked down and noticed one of my bile bags was filling up and then I realized it was my right bili bag that hasn't drained for almost 3 weeks! This is the one I am supposed to get fixed on Monday. I had to empty it three times last night, so I don't think anything is wrong with it now. That is good news, but now the top one has stopped draining. Given this turn of events, I'm not sure what will happen with my appointment on Monday.

More Surgery

I went in today for blood work. I am scheduled to go in to St. Mary's for a re-do of my right bili tube on Monday morning, so I had to get these blood tests done today. I am glad to only be going to Reno for this, but I am not looking forward to yet another surgical procedure. When I asked them what I should expect in the way of recovery, they said it will be just like the other times I have had it done. I was hoping it might be easier since they just did it, but I guess that doesn't make any difference in how I recover from it. I've had enough experience with this surgery that I am kind of scared. But my right side is not draining at all, so something needs to be done. Other than dreading Monday, I am doing about the same. My back pain is still there, not great, but not the worst I've had. I've also been able to get some rest lately, so that is a good thing.

Feeling Better

My pain has decreased again today. I still feel it, but it is way better than a few days ago. I had a nice day today. I had a visit from a friend who brought flowers and hot chocolate. It was a perfect day for that and I enjoyed watching the storm. It was a pretty quiet day for me with not much to report except that I am feeling a little bit better.

Drainage Tubes

I called the doctor in San Francisco and shared with him my concern that the stent on my right side is not draining. He then called the doctor in Reno to see about re-doing this drain. The plan is to schedule it at St. Mary's to save us the burden of travel. They told me that the tubes clog easily, but it hasn't even been 2 1/2 weeks, so I didn't expect to have to do anything more with this so soon.
One more worry for me is these stitches that hold my tubes in place. They are pulling out and it's kind of gross. David taped one up where the stitches were starting to come out, and the doctor said that we can tape them up or I can push the stitches back in. Eeeww! I spoke to this doctor twice today, and he was very concerned about my discomfort. Although he said what I am expereincing with the stitches is normal, he did have a thought about the pain I've been having. He says it comes from the tumors pressing on the tubes in my liver. There is not much they can do about that, but they could replace one (not all three) of these plastic tubes with a metal tube. There is no guarantee that this would help, but it's nice to know the doctors are still trying to come up with ways to improve what I'm dealing with.
My day was good despite the pain that persists in my back and side. It is still bad enough to wake me up at night, but it has been decreasing since last Wednesday. I had friends come give me a back massage and paint my toenails. It was nice to be pampered. The continual kindness shown to my family is amazing. Thank you for your prayers, meals, and kind thoughts.

A Little Better

Since Wednesday, my pain has gotten a little bit better. I have been able to be up out of bed, which makes a difference for me. Being in bed isn't one bit relaxing or enjoyable when you are in pain and laying there is your only option. I have upped my pain medication, which also helps, and I started using the lydecaine back patches that were prescribed for my back pain a while ago. They were helping, so I was excited to use them. When I took one off, I'd put another right on. I even sat with a heating pad on my back while I was wearing one. Then David was helping me change it and he noticed that my back looked kind of red. When I checked the recommendations on the patches, I remembered they are supposed to be worn for 12 hours on, then 24 hours off. Oops.
I will be in touch with the doctor this week to see if the drains are performing the way they want them to. My right side still isn't draining, which David reminds me may be a good thing if it is draining into my digestive tract like a healthy person's would. We'll see. I did just have surgery last week, so maybe some of this pain is just a normal part of the recovery. I appreciate everyone's kind words and prayers. The support for my family and me is wonderful!

Back Pain

I don't know if it is possible to quantify pain, but I think today was my worst day so far with the pain. I have this grabbing pain in my back and side and it was so intense today. I take my pain meds, but they really don't do anything for my back pain. I was up for breakfast for a little bit and I started feeling nauseous and the pain started to get worse and I had to go back to bed. I was down in bed all day long. I tried to get up for lunch, but I really couldn't, so I ate my lunch in my bed. I was able to get up with my mother-in-law's help at about 4:30. Sheryl did all my laundry and I wasn't able to be up with her or do anything. A friend stopped by who rubbed my back, which really helped my back feel better. Overall, it was a really hard day for me. My only hope is that tomorrow will be better.

Still Recovering

Since I have been back from San Francisco, I have been in quite a lot of pain. I spent the day today sitting in the chair talking to my mother-in-law. I can't lie down because it is hard to get up when I've been down and hard to lie down again after I have to get up from the bed. I alternate between sitting in the chair and standing up and holding onto the chair when the sitting gets too painful. I am hoping that because I did not spend a lot of time down today that I will be able to sleep tonight.

I didn't talk to the doctor today. When I ask questions, there aren't a lot of answers. I guess there's not a set of predictable patterns my illness is following. But I am not draining like I thought I would after this surgery.

On the bright side, Logan made a delicious chili last night - I am telling you she is getting to be a great cook!

Back Home

The trip to San Francisco was quick at least because they didn't even keep me overnight. I was in a lot of pain, more than I was expecting, which is saying somethign because I was expecting to be in some pain. They tell me the surgery was successful so I hope it shows up in my blood test numbers.

We left on Wednesday, drove there, and went in on Thursday morning. They didn't make new incisions, but they made the one on my left side bigger. Since I've been home I've tried to look at it, but it's a lot bigger than before, so it's not pretty. The doctors released me on Thursday, but I was in so much pain on the drive home that we got a hotel about 30 miles away from the hospital and stayed overnight. The pain wasn't in my back like it usually is when I have to be in the car, it was in the sites of the drains and from the inside where they repositioned the tubes in my liver. We finished our drive and got home Friday. I have been resting and my pain is going down each day, so it isn't excruciating now. The SF doctors say I should have this procedure done very six weeks because things get pretty clogged up inside. They also said I can have this done in Reno, which would be much more convenient.

The outcome of this is that I should drain better and my bili count should go down. That way I should be able to have more chemo. So far, my left side is draining more, but my right side is still not draining. I am resting and recovering today while David takes the kids clothes shopping. I am feeling much better than I was two days ago, so I am hopeful that I will continue to feel better. Thank you for your prayers and concern. It's good to be home.

Preparing to Leave

I am happy to report that I am feeling pretty much the same. Since I am not having significant pain, that is good news. I have been enjoying these days without the intense pain.

Because I am going to San Francisco, I decided not to worry about getting my blood tests done because they will test my blood again when I get there. Instead, I got a good nap this afternoon, which I think was a more efficient use of my time. The trip to San Francisco is really hard on me and it takes me a few days to recover from it. I don't want to start the trip being worn out. I will be glad to have the doctor take a good look at my drains because one of them has been leaking and I will feel better when I get it checked out. David and I will leave on Wednesday afternoon to drive there, and hopefully will be released on Friday if all goes well. I'll update as soon as I'm able.

Thank you for your prayers and kindness. It is heart-warming to see how many people have shown such genuine love and concern for our family during this time. We really appreciate it.

Feeling Good

I am feeling pretty good today. Even though I am feeling good, it's not like feeling normal. I still have the back pain and I still can't move to well, but it is better than how I was feeling a week ago. Like last night, I wasn't able to stir my brownies well enough to get everything mixed in and I couldn't get the pan out of the cupboard. David had to help me, but I was glad to be able to make a treat for my family.

My right side has stopped draining again. I'm not worried about it because I will be getting thoroughly checked out by the doctors in San Francisco on Thursday. I think I need to have my blood tests done early this week.

I had some friends come over to decorate my front porch with beautiful mums and fall decorations. It looks so nice! I had another friend bring my family delicious treats from Apple Hill. Thank you for taking such good care of me and remembering me. I appreciate it so much!

Family Day

My pain level has continued to be lower than usual and I really enjoy it after having such bad pain for a while. This evening the kids were all here, including Alex, and they each had a friend or two over. We watched a movie together, then some of them went to get pizza. I even felt good enough to make brownies. Even though I don't have the energy or strength I used to have, having them here reminded me of the way things were before all this sickness started.

Potassium and Surgery

It is Thursday already and what a nice day for me, the cleaning lady was at my house today! My mom is here, she is coming on Thursdays and staying until Friday evening. It is nice to have her here to help out and keep me company. We even took a drive today to grab lunch and then drove to the park to eat in the car.

My pain level is still good. I am having more pain in my back, but the excruciating pain in my abdomen and side is still gone. I had my blood tests done and my bili was an 8.8, which is too high for chemo this week. We found out that my potassium level is down. When I asked what that means, the nurse said it means I could have a heart attack of all things! However, I am treating this by upping my potassium intake with food (bananas, cantaloupe, avocados, etc.) so they must not think a heart attack is right around the corner for me.

Next Wednesday David and I will head back to San Francisco for a stent replacement surgery. They like to re-do them every couple of months, plus one of my stitches has come out, so I guess it is time to have this done. David says this should be easier since it is the third time and I probably won't need the anesthesia. Yeah right - I don't want to take that chance! The new stents should make my bilirubin count come down, so I may be able to have chemo again the following week. I feel strong enough for chemo, but I really am skin and bones right now. The appetite stimulant is working well, and I feel like I am eating more, but the doctor told me it will be really hard at this point with my cancer to just maintain my weight and I am not likely to gain any. But it is nice to be able to eat, and I plan to continue eating as much as I can.

Small Miracles

Today has been a good day with my pain -- or lack thereof! I have been able to eat, so I guess the appetite cocktail is working for me. I am trying to drink several Ensures a day in addition to eating more. My swelling is still under control. My legs are swelling a little, but it isn't painful and it isn't as bad as it's been previously. Also, much to my surprise, the bili tube on my right side started draining today. It hasn't drained for a while, but for some reason the draining started again. I can't explain it, but I am pretty happy about it.

Pain-Free Day

I don't know why, but I am having a pain-free day. The pain in my side and stomach were getting less yesterday, and today even the pain in my back is gone! I wish I knew what makes the difference because I would do that every day. I am sure enjoying it and I am trying not doing anything strenuous to ruin it (just clipping my toenails right now!)

I had an appetite stimulant from the doctor that I have been taking and it is helping. I have been eating better. The swelling in my feet is gone too. I can't account for these wonderful changes in how I'm feeling, but I am very grateful!

Better Day

Yesterday and today have been better with the pain. I still have pain in my right side, kind of in my rib cage and in my back, but it has decreased enough that it feels like I'm having some relief. I got my blood work done and my bili count was 7.9. That was a small drop from last week, but still not low enough for chemo today. I will be talking to the doctor to see if he has any instructions or suggestions for me.

The swelling in my feet and legs has also gotten better. I still have a lot of bloating in my stomach, but my feet didn't even swell when I was walking around barefoot last night. I was up for about three hours and they were o.k, so I'm pretty happy about that. I am hoping to get some appetite, right now I am forcing the food because I know I need it.

Thank you for your prayers and kind words, they make a difference for me.

Sleeping Through The Pain

I wish I had better news to report because there are so many kind people who are concerned about me. My pain at least as bad and I really think it is worse today. I have been sleeping a lot because it is the best way I know of to deal with the pain. I don't even need sleeping pills, I am just able to sleep and when I do, I don't think about the pain. When I am awake my whole back and side just burns with pain. I am also having a really dry mouth, which may be partly because I'm not drinking enough. Even though I have a glass of water on my nightstand, it is hard to reach it because of the pain. My mother-in-law has been over all day today. That helps out a lot. She made a nice ham and scalloped potatoes dinner and I am planning to enjoy it with my family. I am trying to eat, but again, I have no appetite.

I will be talking to the doctor in a few days. I am supposed to have blood work on Wednesday, but that will depend on my pain level. The doctor hopes I can have chemo again on Thursday, which seems really optimistic to me. I will feel pretty good if I am able to have my lab work on Wednesday.

Test Results

I got my blood work results back, my bili count was 8.3. That's not as low as last time, but it is lower than many of my previous blood test results. I wasn't expecting it to be as low as last time, that really took my by surprise. It just goes to show you that you never know. I'll get another round of blood work done next week. Dr. Abrass is hoping I can have chemo next week.

I have really been in a lot of pain today. The muscle relaxers haven't made any noticeable difference in my pain. I am on the maximum amount right now and I am having a lot of pain down my back and into my side and abdomen. I am just trying to get through the day. I think some of the pain comes from laying down so much. It's a catch-22 because I lay down because it makes the pain better, but I think laying down makes me have more pain when I have to get up. I don't know what else to do with the pain, We'll see how the day goes and I guess time will tell.

Blood Work

I got my blood work done today, but have no results yet. Of course I am hoping for good news, but we'll see what the numbers are. I talked to the doctor today and he perscribed a muscle relaxer for it, in addition to what I am already taking. I hope that does the trick. My swelling is about the same. I got a nap this afternoon, which is a good thing because I know I need the extra rest. Other than that, today was just a normal day, or at least as normal as my life is these days.

Back Pain

Today was really just more of the same. My pain is getting worse. It is a burning pain that goes from my mid - upper back down to my tailbone. I called into the doctor, but I never heard back from him. So I increased my pain medication on my own, but kept it still within the limits prescribed by the doctor. I'm just not taking the upper limit because I hate to take so much medication. It helped with the pain in my stomach, but it really didn't seem to do much for my back pain. My swelling is about the same today. I had a some friends bring a delicious lunch and I got a chance to visit for a little while. I also took a nap this afternoon. The nap was especially nice because not only do I need the rest, but it is the only relief I get from the pain. Tomorrow I hope to talk to the doctor about this pain.

Labor Day

It was nice to have David and the kids around today. The kids did homework and chores and David was on call, so he was in and out too, but I enjoyed their company when they were around. I am finally feeling a little less tired. However, I am having a cramping, grabbing pain in my stomach and back. I have tried to be up on my feet a little more today, or at least sitting in a chair instead of laying down. Staying down helps my swelling, but it is hard when I am down all day to get up when I need to with the pain. Despite being up more today, the swelling in my legs is better. My feet are swollen, but not up to my knees. I am trying to eat more and I know I need to be better about drinking my Ensures!

I will be talking to the doctor tomorrow. I'm pretty sure he will want me to have blood work this week. I am going to talk to him about upping my pain meds again. I hate to be taking so much medication, but my pain is increasing, so I think my medication has to increase too.

Still Tired

I was Rip Van Winkle today, sleeping most of the day away. It is hard to be so sleepy all the time, I am missing so much! I feel like I have no choice but to sleep. Being down helps my swelling, so my feet and legs feel better today. When I am up they swell all the way up to my knees. I have a dull ache in my side, but it is tolerable. I am sticking to my schedule of pain meds.

My Home health nurse came on Friday and helped me with my bandages. I had questions about the swelling which she was able to answer. The fluid that causes all this swelling is just part of my liver not functioning. I don't think it will get better; I actually expect it to get worse.

I got to see Alex briefly on Friday, which was good. She went to the football game on Friday night, as did my other kids. They enjoyed the game and it was good to hear about a Greenwave win!

Getting Better

Today was a good day. I am finally feeling better and more energetic. I have been up a little bit more and I have been able to eat. I am having major swelling problems, up to my knees! I still have the pain in my side, but I am trying to ignore it. My home health nurse has been keeping in touch with me and that is very comforting to have her checking up on me at home. My plan for the weekend is just to rest and eat so I can regain some strength, then we'll see what the doctor orders for next week.

Thank you all for being the most supportive friends ever. You might think people would get tired of being so kind to my family in this ordeal, but we continue to be blessed by your kindness. Thank you for the meals, cards, love and prayers. We appreciate it!

New Pain

I did not get my blood work done today. I am still so exhausted from last week's chemo and I really need to get my appetite back so I can regain some strength. Then I can think about another round of chemo. I have slept a lot of the day today. I have a new pain in my left side, so we'll have to see how that develops.

The Sleep Continues

Thankfully, I am not sick and I think I could probably go off of the one nausea medications at this point. I am still so worn out. I sleep for long stretches, but I know I need to eat. I have no appetite and I'm sleeping so much. When I wake up I have to force myself to eat. I am trying to drink Ensures as well to get some more calories in me. I have been elevating my feet while I sleep, so my foot swelling is better. I was awake for just a little while this afternoon, and I went to watch TV with my mother-in-law, and after a few minutes, I was ready for another nap! I feel like I am missing a lot by sleeping so much, but I must need the rest, and it is better than throwing up! I am having blood work done tomorrow to see if my body is ready to do this again on Thursday.

Still Sleepy

I am sleeping like crazy. This chemo really wipes me out! But I am happy to report that so far, I am not sick. I'll have more to say when I have more energy, right now, I am just trying to sleep as much as I can.

Tired

I have spent today recovering from my chemo yesterday. It really just wipes me out. I slept all day. I haven't felt sick yet, just really tired. There's not much to report, just that I'm sleeping all I can. I'd much rather deal with being tired than being nauseous. We'll see what tomorrow brings.

Chemo

I had a good chemo day, if there is such a thing. It was the 4 hour chemo, so it makes for a long day. I found out I gained some weight since last time, which I was really happy about. Sheryl took me today and stayed for a while, then right after she left to do errands, Alex came and stayed with me for the rest of the time. I also had a friend that I haven't seen in ages come to visit while I was there, so the time during chemo was enjoyable. Because my liver counts were good this time, I am able to have two nausea meds instead of one. We will see how I do, but if my body can handle it, the doctor would like me to have chemo again next week. After my previous chemos, I have still been recovering a week later, but maybe this time will be different.

I wore my compression socks today. It took me about 10 minutes to put each one on. They kept the swelling down, but my legs and feet are still sore. The doctor said my swelling was nothing and it can still get a lot worse. I didn't get home from Reno until about 6:00 tonight. I ate some, but I feel really bloated and it's hard to eat. I am going to lay down and elevate my feet and hopefully get some rest tonight. Thank you for your prayers.

Bili Count!

I got the results from my blood work and my bili count was 5.3! That is the lowest it has been since my diagnosis. I hope it wasn't an error and it was really 15.3 or something. I think I'll check on that possibility. I was sure it would be higher because I hadn't been draining as well, but maybe I've had some internal draining going on too. This also means I am eligible for chemo tomorrow, so I'm going in tomorrow for another round. I'm not really looking for ward to it, I'd rather have a foot massage like yesterday.

I had a cleaning team come in today and it was surprisingly emotional for me. I have always cleaned my own house. I have enjoyed having it clean and I have been very diligent about my cleaning over the years. It's surprising what is hard for me in this journey, and watching someone else clean my house because I'm not able to do it myself made me feel a little helpless. However, the cleaning team will be coming every other week, so I told the kids we have to be neat and make it last until then. While they were cleaning, I had lunch and had a nice nap, and I woke up to a clean house, so it wasn't all bad!

Back to School

Sending the kids back to school today went better than I thought. I was worried about spending the day alone in a quiet house, but I had plenty of company and the time flew by. I had visitors and wonderful foot massages that really helped both the pain and swelling in my feet. I went to get my blood work done. I don't expect my numbers to be too good because my right side hasn't been draining, but then it started draining a little more today. I was fitted for compression socks that hopefully will be in tomorrow. I had time to visit with my kids after their school days and practices. All in all, it was a nice day.

Swelling Feet

It is almost bedtime now and I am sitting massaging my own feet to try to do something about this swelling. I talked to the doctor today who said that the swelling comes from my liver not functioning like it should. I am getting fitted for compression socks tomorrow. I will shower at night, then put these socks on before my feet touch the ground in the morning. They should keep the pressure and swelling down.

I'm going to have blood work done tomorrow and the doctor wants to check my protein as well.
My right side has really not been draining like it should over the past 48 hours, so I don't know what that will do to my numbers.

I also want to thank everyone who has been bringing in meals. I know I say we don't need it, but really, you don't even know what a huge help it is to me. Thank you, thank you! You're helping me so much.

Quiet Day

Today was an uneventful day, the kind of day I have come to appreciate. I had to decide early in the day if I wanted to have a back ache from lying down all day or to have swollen feet from being out of bed and on my feet. I decided to take the back ache and keep my feet from swelling. I did pretty well but got up later in the evening, and sure enough, they swelled right up. David and Logan massaged them, which gets the fluid out, but it comes right back. I wouldn't mind it so much if it didn't hurt, but it hurts my feet and legs all the way up to my knees. I will be talking to the doctor tomorrow and get his suggestions for managing this latest inconvenience. I had a tiny bit of pain on my right side today, and I don't think it's draining like it should. I plan to have blood work done on Tuesday so we'll see what the numbers say.

Good Day

My mom came to visit and help today. I was feeling good enough that I went with her to run some errands. I even went into Raley's with her. The parking lot was pretty empty and we just had a few things to get, so it was okay. My pain is much better, but I still have some pain in my back. My feet are swelling up, and it is happening more quickly. By the time I walked out into the kitchen in the morning, they were already swelling, and it is kind of painful. The swelling starts in the morning and continues to get worse as the day goes on. Standing makes it worse and having someone rub my feet helps. So I guess I should be sitting around all day having foot massages. That doesn't sound too bad, does it? We had a delicious tri-tip dinner with a cherry dessert that a friend brought over and I got to visit with my mom and a friend. So overall, it was a good day.

Last Chance for Birthday Book

Dear Blog Readers,
Thank you to the many of you who wrote your thoughts for Sheri's birthday book. We have many, but we'd like more. If you didn't write your memories yet, please take a minute to write something now. If you can get them e-mailed to Anne Hyde at pioneerway9@hotmail.com by Friday night, she will still have time to get it ready for Sheri's birthday.

Anne told Sheri that we are compiling this memory book and she is so excited. This book will be a great opportunity to remember good times with Sheri and show our love to her. Love and laughter have an amazing power to uplift and strengthen the spirit. Your thoughts don't have to be long and if you haven't written yet there's still time. We don't want anyone to miss the chance to be a part of something wonderful for Sheri.

Thank you,

Anne Hyde
Julie Stockard

Feeling Better

Today I took my new recommended dosage of pain medication. I can't believe how much better I felt! I had more energy and I didn't need to take a nap this afternoon. I was able to be out of bed and even do a few dishes during the day. This evening, David was roping and Logan was riding horses and I felt strong enough to take a short walk outside. It was so nice. The one problem today is that my feet are pretty swollen. I'm told it is from poor circulation, and I stayed off my feet for a lot of the afternoon, but it didn't seem to improve the situation. I have to say that swollen feet are preferable to persistent pain.

Medication

I got some good news about this pain I've been having, or at least some news about how I'm medicating it. After talking to two doctors today, they both agreed that my medication dosage needs to be changed to accommodate this new level of pain. David reminded me that when we were first starting out with this, I told the doctors that I didn't want to be on heavy pain medication, so my pills have low milligrams of the drugs and I can be taking more without becoming a drug addict. So, instead of taking one pill in the morning and one in the evening, I will be taking two in the morning and two in the evening, with the option to take another one midday if needed. That will be a significant increase in the drugs I'm taking, but I think I need it to deal with the pain. I was getting discouraged thinking that the pain was too much for the meds, so it was a relief to find out that I can safely use more medication to fight the pain.

Less Pain...Finally!

Today has been better with the pain. I'm not sure, maybe the pain is the same, but at least I have been able to manage it better with my meds. After talking with the home health nurse, I got the go-ahead to increase my dosage of my pain medication. It was encouraging to talk to her. I thought that the pain was because I have cancer and it's getting worse, but she said I shouldn't have pain that is so bad that I can't move, and that if it gets that bad, there are things I can do about it. It was nice to have things not getting worse at least today.

Today our family celebrates Logan's birthday. Alex helped me out with some birthday shopping and a few of Logan's friends planned a lunch for her. Logan has been my constant companion this summer. She has stepped up to do anything that needs to be done here, taking on way more responsibility than I ever wanted to give her. It's hard to believe she is fifteen!

Increasing Pain

How can it be that this pain keeps getting worse? Every day since it started, the pain seems so bad, but it still continues to get worse. I am on the maximum dose of my pain medication, yet the pain continues to increase and spread. It is like a burning in my back that won't go away with medication and whether I stand, sit, or lay, I can't get seem to get any relief from it. David rubbed my back for a while tonight which helped, but otherwise, I can't find any combination of patches, pillows, or positions that make it any better. It is really discouraging. I didn't have blood work done today. There is no way I could get in the car even to get to the hospital. I feel like I can hardly move. I don't know what the next step is for pain management, but for now, I am just trying to get by.

Moving Day

I still have the pain, and it has moved some to my right side. I accidentally slept 3 1/2 hours past the time to take my pain medication one day and I could really tell that I missed it. Even with the pain meds, I still have the pain, but the medication makes it much more bearable.

I was able to go to Reno on Saturday. I rested at my mom's house while my family helped Alex move into her new apartment in Sparks. Then I was able to go see where she and her friends are living. It is a nice apartment, it looks a lot nicer than what you'd imagine for a college freshman, but she has a great situation with her friends there. Her things were all unpacked and it looks really nice. I was even able to walk up the stairs by myself, although I had about 18 people standing closely nearby just in case! I was so glad to see where she is living. I had really been dreading the day when she would leave home. She's got a lot in front of her with starting college, and I'm not physically able to give her the kind of support I'd like to, but I can see that she has grown up a lot and she is ready.

Still More Pain

The pain has been worse today. I have done nothing, and I mean nothing, all day. I just try to get comfortable so the pain isn't so bad. I have upped my pain meds, but it doesn't take the pain away. I guess this is just part of cancer - but it hurts and it's discouraging to have this pain. I hope tomorrow brings some relief. My doctor wants me to have another chemo treatment on Wednesday and I hope I'm strong enough for it.

More Pain

Today I woke up with a new pain in my right side. It is a sharp pain and it gets worse when I lay down, but even when I'm standing and sitting, it's still bad. I haven't been able to sleep at all today. The pain meds are not helping, at least it doesn't feel like they are, and having a new pain makes me worry. I don't know what is causing this pain or how it will progress.

My mom came today. She had planned to come anyway, but with this pain it was really nice to have her here with me. I have still not had the nausea I had after the last chemo. I haven't had much of an appetite, but I'm still eating anyway. I'm hoping for a better day tomorrow, I guess time will tell.

Bili Count

I went in to have my blood work done today. My bili count was a 9.7. That is probably too high for chemo on Wednesday. I'll talk to my doctor tomorrow to get the official word, but I'll be a little surprised if it happens. I have been really tired, but I am not feeling sick yet, so that is some good news.

Not Sick Yet

I don't know what is making the difference, but I am still not feeling sick. I can hardly believe it. I am not doing anything different from last time, but the sickness hasn't hit me. I am still very tired. I have not done anything at all today, I mean nothing. I have no energy, but I am not sick, so I can't complain. I am scheduled to get my blood work done tomorrow, so that is the plan.

So far so good...

I have been waiting for the nausea to hit me like it did after the last chemo, but I am pleased to report that I have felt pretty good today. I am keeping up on my nausea meds, which must be helping. I am really tired, but tired is so much easier to deal with than sick. What a blessing!

Speaking of blessings, I can't let today pass without mentioning that it is my 22nd wedding anniversary! I have been so blessed to have David by my side through all of the ups and downs of the past 22 years, and especially wth what we've been through in the last few months. I can't imagine life without him, he is exactly what I need - what our family needs. I love him more now than ever!

Tired

I started my day off with a great sleep last night after the chemo. I was up a few times, but I was able to go back to sleep. I actually felt fine this morning. I was up for a while but started getting tired before I could even finish getting ready for the day. I stayed up and ate a good lunch, but then I was so tired I felt like I just couldn't keep my eyes open. This is how it was with the last chemo. I was really tired before I got really sick. It seems to be following the same pattern, so we'll see what tomorrow brings.

Second Chemo

I made it to my second treatment today, where I got the four-hour treatment instead of the one-hour variety I was expecting. I was glad to be able to have it today, but I have to say, it was a different experience from last time. We started with talking to the doctor. Dr. Abrass assures us that this blend of drugs I'm getting for chemo has been shown to shrink tumors in similar cancers. It won't cure what I've got, but he hopes it can keep it at bay.

To start with, the people were quiet in the room today. No chatting and "partying," just a lot of tired people who seemed to prefer a quiet room. Joyce, my chair neighbor from last time, was there earlier in the day. She called me and waited for me for 1 1/2 hours, but our appointments didn't overlap after all and I missed seeing her. Maybe it was the quiet room, maybe the drugs, but I was a little emotional about all of this. It's hard to be alone with your thoughts for so long sometimes. Also, the chair was not as comfy as I remembered it from last time. I went into a jam-packed chemo room and "my chair" was taken, so I had to sit in a different place. The nurse gave me another back patch to help with the pain in my back. As the patients cleared out, I moved into my first chair, which had an empty seat for David. By the time I was finished, it was just us and the nurse.

I am home now, and hoping to eat and rest. The doctor hopes I am able to get blood work done on Monday, talk to him with the new blood work results on Tuesday, and hopefully have chemo (the 1-hour variety) again on Wednesday of next week.

Sheri's Birthday

Dear Blog Readers,
As many of you know, Sheri's birthday is coming up this month. We would like to invite you to contribute to a memory book for her. Please type your your memories and thoughts for Sheri (in Microsoft Word format if possible). Then e-mail your memories in an attachment to Anne Hyde. She will print them out and put them in a book. Feel free to spread the word so that we get a good response for Sheri.

Please have your memories to Anne no later than August 17. If you prefer to mail or hand deliver to Anne, her address is 9655 Pioneer Way.

Anne's e-mail: pioneerway9@hotmail.com.

Thank you for contributing. We think this will be something that Sheri and her family will enjoy.

Sincerely,
Anne Hyde
Julie Stockard

Chemo tomorrow

Dr. Abrass says I am ready for another chemo treatment tomorrow. I don't know that chemo by itself is something I look forward to, but I know this is something I need, so I am glad I am able to have it tomorrow. My appointment is at 11:50 and it is a one-hour treatment.

Today I have felt good. I was mostly pain-free, until the early evening when I started getting pain in my back and abdomen. I'm hoping for a restful night before my big day tomorrow. Thank you for your prayers and concern - it really gives me strength!

Bili Count

I got my blood work done early enough to get the results back before the lab closed for the day. My bili count was a 6.6. That is a slight increase from what it was in the hopital over the weekend, but I think it is low enough for chemo on Thursday. I'll talk to the doctor tomorrow to see what he thinks, but I'm optimistic. I am feeling good and I hope we're in agreement that I'm ready for another chemo this week.

Fever

The Home Health nurse came today and I had a temperature of 100.5 and my feet are still swollen. I was surprised about the fever because I have felt good today. She called my doctor because having a fever so soon after surgery is not a good thing, but they say it is not a real concern unless it reaches 101.5. As for the feet, I need to stay off them as much as possible, to keep the swelling down. I was under orders to rest and drink lots of fluids today.

I have felt fine. I ate small but frequent meals today and I am still draining. I go in for blood work tomorrow and hopefully I will have the results by the end of the day. I'm hoping for low numbers!

Day of Rest

I planned to rest today, since I have seen from past experience that I need to rest after a stay in the hospital. My sisters wanted to come out to visit, and I said that I would be resting and maybe another day would be better. As the day got going, I actually felt stronger than usual, so I called and said to come on out. They came out and we visited and had a nice day. We even walked over to my mother-in-law's house and I felt good.

The one complaint I have is that my feet are swollen, which is a little painful for me. I have tried icing them, which was uncomfortable and didn't really help. I tried a few other things, and in the end, having David rub my feet was what helped the most. As long as I stayed off my feet, they were o.k., but when I got up again, the swelling came back. I am going to try sleeping with them up on a pillow tonight so we'll see how they do tomorrow.

For the upcoming week, I have blood work on Tuesday, I'll talk to the doctor on Wednesday, and hopefully I'll have chemo on Thursday. Thank you so much for the prayers and kind words. It means so much to me!

A Bit of Good News

Well, all my new hardware seems to be working…lots of draining all the way home from San Francisco today. We got home around 2 this afternoon. I have some internal aches and pains from the work that was done, but nothing that is more than I can handle at this point.

It’s TOTALLY worth some discomfort though because not only do things seem to be draining better, but get this….my bili count was down to a 6 (SIX!) today. That’s low enough to start chemo again. Now I just need to rest up from my trip and hope my new tubes keep doing their job.

Another Trip to San Francisco

Tuesday night, the right side of my liver completely stopped draining. We called the hospital Wednesday. David changed the bags …but that didn’t work. We called the hospital again and they gave me an appointment for 11am Friday in San Francisco.

David and I made the trip early this morning. Now I have all new tubes inside. I’m getting pretty used to this particular procedure. There are the expected aches and pains, but overall I’m doing ok. I’ve been living on water and ice chips and now have the ok to eat…so David is off to find me a BLT. I hope it tastes good. I will be staying the night here so the medical staff can keep an eye on me, but should be able to go home tomorrow. David will be staying here at the hospital with me. I’m eyeing the small chair in the corner of the room hoping that it makes into a bed or something.

Hopefully this will fix the problem and my bili count will start dropping. If this is the case, I will be able to start chemo again next week. It seems like chemo isn’t a pleasant thing to pray for, but that’s the goal now.

A Perfect Day

Seriously, I had no pain today! I don't know how that happened, but it really felt good to have a pain-free day. I had my blood work done this morning. My bili count is a 10.3 (and a drop from last week), but probably no chemo this week. I will talk to the doctor in the morning to find out for sure.

After my blood work, I was able to sit in the living room, which I usually can't do because I'm in pain. I just sat and talked with my kids, then David came home for lunch and we went for a drive into town. I actually felt like I could go do something. Logan and I went outside to deadhead some roses, then I thought I shouldn't overdo it, so I took a little nap before dinner. My appetite isn't great, but I had chicken and potatoes and fruit and I may have some soup still tonight.

I say that I don't know how it happened that I felt so good today, but I think it must have something to do with all the prayers offered on my behalf. Thank you for the love , encouragement, and prayers.

Pain

Today I had some really bad pain. Not just bad pain, but a horrible, sharp, cramping pain in my back and side from my liver. I couldn't sit or stand and we really weren't sure what to do. We thought the hospital could deliver better or more efficient pain meds through an IV, but Dr. Abrass told me if the pain gets really bad I could take two pain pills. I took two pills, David rubbed my back, which didn't prove to be as helpful as you might think, and he put one of the pain patches on my back. Somehow the combination of those things made the pain subside enough that I could lay down this afternoon. I was able to eat after that and I have felt better this evening since then.

I can manage pain, but I know this disease is progressing in the wrong direction. That's the part that is hard to deal with.

Improving

Today has been a big improvement over yesterday. I was sick with thrush yesterday. It was coming on Wednesday, but I didn't notice the symptoms. It was causing a bad taste in my mouth and making my throat so dry. I even got a vitamin painfully lodged in my throat because it was so dry. It took forever to get it down, and finally after drinking lots of water and massaging my throat it went down. It was painful! My mom was at my house yesterday and I felt so bad that I couldn't get out of bed, not even to eat. The Home Health nurse (She is so nice!) called to check on me and when I told her my situation, she suggested some things to help. She called the doctor and got me a prescription that has really helped me. I feel so much better today. I am able to eat and drink and get up, so that's a big improvement.

One other improvement for my surroundings was that when my mom came, she brought me new sheets for my bed. They feel really nice, but the best part is that they are not yellow. My other ones are a mustard color that I liked until I got sick. With my jaundice, it's just not a good color for me. These new ones are cream colored and they are great.

No Chemo This Week

As expected, I will have no chemo this week. The doctor said to rest and eat up and let's hope my bili comes down. There is some high-calorie fluid they can give me to help me gain some weight, but the doctor said it has to go through my nose, to which I said, "No, thank you, I'll just eat more." I have a lot of tubes right now, but I sure don't need one going in my nose if I can avoid it. My doctor agrees, eating more is the way for me to go right now.

Home Health Care came out this afternoon. They checked my bili bags and helped me change my bandages. It was nice to have them come to my home and they will come back next week. We had Chinese food last night that I had for lunch today. I ate what seems like a lot to me right now and it tasted good. Logan made me a milkshake with protein powder in it and I had it finished in a matter of minutes. I had a good day with a few visitors and no naps, so I am looking forward to sleeping well tonight. My next appointment is to get my blood tests done early next week. Until then, I'm just eating, resting and draining.

Another day...

I did not hear from the doctor today, but I am pretty sure there is no chemo for me this week. I'll know tomorrow for sure. Home Health is coming tomorrow afternoon to assess my needs. There may be things they can do to help with my bili bags and other medical concerns.

I have felt pretty good today, except for a bit more stomach pain. I have a pain patch that releases pain killers, plus the pain meds that I take on schedule. The pain patch wasn't laying flat on my skin for a few days and it actually came off today. I wasn't sure up until now if it was doing anything, but I'm here to tell you that it does. I am trying to eat, but it's hard. I can't really explain it, and I have had many offers from people who are willing to do some of the eating for me -- if only I could take them up on it! Food just doesn't taste good to me. It's not so much that eating makes me sick, but I have this metally taste in my mouth and it's hard to get food down.

There is not a lot going on for me today, I had my "normal" morning routine, which includes a short nap, but I didn't have an afternoon nap today. I hope that means I will sleep well tonight.

Blood Work

My bili count was a 12.3 today. That is down slightly from last week, but still higher than it's been for a while. Tomorrow I will talk to Dr. Abrass to see what he thinks, but I'm pretty sure this means no chemo this week. I have been draining a lot of fluid since my last chemo, and I'd hoped it would result in a lower bili count. It's very frustrating to see that count so high when I want it going the other direction so I can have more treatments.

Physically, I have felt pretty good today. I had a nice nap and I have been trying to eat. I drank 1 1/2 Ensures and David suggested I eat as many cookies as I can, but I could only get down one. Normally, I would have no problem eating a bunch, but it is just really hard now. I am taking my pain meds every four hours now. I have been sporadic about taking them. I take them, then it feels like I'd be fine without them so I go off them, but then I have the pain again and I realize I still need them. So now I am writing down when I take them so I can consistently take them every four hours.

Thank you for the prayers and supportive comments, cards and calls. I appreciate knowing so many people are in my corner!

Still Recovering

Thursday night, after my drive home from Reno, I was still feeling a little sick from the chemo the week before. I went to a lot of effort to get extra calories that day, but I lost them that evening with lingering sickness. So it was a good call not to have another chemo that day since I was still sick from the first one. I think it's safe to say that now I am over the chemo sickness.

Friday my parents came to Fallon for a visit. Logan helped me get ready and we enjoyed having them here. I felt pretty good most of the time, but I was weak and had to lay down a lot, so we had to do some of our visiting in my room while I was laying down. They stayed over night and this morning my mom worked in my flower beds and my dad sat with me on the porch. We took a little drive into town. It felt nice just to be out. I have not had any more throwing up, but I have no energy. I'm not sleepy like I was and I don't have the aching in my stomach like I was having, so I take that as a sign of improvement.

Today our family celebrates David's birthday. Of course I don't have anything big planned, but I would like him to know how much we love him and what an anchor he is in our family. There have been many prayers offered on my behalf, but I couldn't get through this without David being with me every step of the way. We love his strength (not just his physical strength, but we appreciate that too!), his wisdom, and his optimistic, upbeat disposition. To celebrate, some friends came to town and they went to get pizza and we'll have cake later tonight. It's not our typical birthday celebration, but I didn't want the day to pass without acknowledging how wonderful he is and how thankful we are for him.

Brazillian Lemonade Recipe

There is an update for today after this recipe, so please keep reading. I'm just not sure how to adjust the order of these posts.


My friend Marianne Schiffer brought this over to me and it was so good. With her permission, I wanted to share her recipe.

Ingredients:
5 limes, one is for garnish
6 cups water
1 cup sugar
6 Tablespoons sweetened condensed milk

Directions:
Mix the water and sugar. This can be done the day before and stored in a pitcher in the fridge. Use 4 of the limes. Wash, cut ends off and cut into eighths. In a blender, add 3 cups of the water/sugar mixture and 2 of the cut limes. Blend until smooth. Run through a sieve or cheesecloth and pour into serving pitcher. Repeat with the remaining water and limes. Add the sweetened condensed milk and stir. Garnish with additional lime and serve immediately over ice. This doesn't keep well, so plan on drinking it all!

Good News/Bad News

I'll start with the bad news. We went in for my chemo appointment and after meeting with the doctor, he decided I should not have chemo today. The doctor said I am frail (I lost quite a bit of weight last week), exhausted, my bili is too high, and the chemo from last week is still in my system. Dr. Abrass said that I am to eat, eat, eat! He suggested eating hot fudge sundaes all day, but I don't think I my body could take that right now. I will go in Monday for bloodwork and then talk to Dr. Abrass on Tuesday to make a plan for my next chemo.


The good news is that I was really relieved not to have to go through that so soon, even though I know I need it. The whole morning I was dreading the appointment, so it was a blessing to me to have a bit longer to recuperate. I think I'll be able to handle it better if I can get a little more of my strength back. Then we were in Reno with nothing scheduled, so we went to my mom's house. David ran some errands and two of my sisters and a niece and nephew came to visit. It was so nice to be out of my house and to see my family and to be awake long enough to enjoy seeing them.


Another good thing for me was that two dear friends organized a little cleaning spree at my house today. Now my house is absolutely sparkling! I think I rest better in a clean house, so this is just what I needed. Also, we have received many delicious meals and we have felt the countless prayers. Thank you all for thinking of us. We so appreciate your love and kindness!

Blood Test

I went to get my blood tested today. My white and red counts are o.k., but my bilirubin is at 13, which was a disappointing surprise to me. I was hoping it would go down. I am really tired and I am just hoping that my blood counts stay up so I can get chemo tomorrow. I hope maybe the next chemo will help my bilirubin count. Thank you for the prayers.

Long Night

I guess I am ready to get the sickness behind me, and I thought I was done with it before it was completely out of my system. I did not get any sleep last night because I was so nauseous. I spent the whole night trying not to move too much because I was sure I would vomit. I just waited for morning to come and when daylight finally arrived, David made me some cereal and half of an english muffin. That meal lasted about 10 minutes before it came back up. I went back to sleep, then got up to shower and I felt o.k. the rest of the day, but I was tired from missing the whole night's sleep.

I took a good nap in the afternoon, but I kept dreaming about lemonade for the longest time. When I woke up, I really wanted some good lemonade and I was about to call David to have him run by Sonic. Right then, my neighbor Mary Ann called to ask me if I'd like some of the Brazillian lemonade she just made!! She brought over the hugest glass of that, and I thought I'd never drink it all, but I did and it was delicious. What a well-timed surprise for me! It was delicious, made with sweetened condensed milk and limes that you blend and run through a cheesecloth. Maybe I should post a recipe!

I hope that now I can say that I am over the sickness. I really want to recuperate enough for another treatment on Thursday. I could get to my appointment and if my blood counts are not normal, they would just have to send me home. That would be a real bummer! My appointment on Thursday is for one hour of chemo, as opposed to the four hour chemo I had last week. I'm not sure what the difference will be, but I'll let you know when I find out.

Feeling Better

I think the sickness is gone. I was able to eat a little more today, but I have been so very tired. I slept really well this afternoon and it's only a few hours later and I am ready to go to bed again! I have also been very thirsty and I have had lots of water. My mother-in-law came over today and stayed the whole day doing laundry and things around the house. It was so nice and I was really glad to have her here.

I got a perscription for these back patches that seem to help with my back pain. I tried the samples I got from the chemo nurse and they work really well, so now I have some of my own. Since I filled this perscription, my back hasn't hurt, but I'll be ready if it starts to hurt again.

I have no appointments tomorrow, just resting and hopefully getting stronger for Thursday to do it all again!

Sickness

Apparently, I am not completely immune to post-chemo sickness. The sickness hit on Saturday evening, but by today it is finally getting better. I have been able to eat some and I have slept off and on. I am still nauseous, but I think (I hope!) the worst of it is behind me. The nurse said three days of sickness, so it was really a blessing to have one and a half days of sleepiness and one and a half of sickness.

I have no appointments until Wednesday when I get my blood drawn to check my bili count and test my white and red blood cell counts. They will check again just before my chemo appointment on Thursday as well. I am just planning to rest, eat what I can, and hope to be feeling better tomorrow.

Chemo Side Effects

OK, I've been waiting for the nausea to start like they promised, but so far all I have done is slept today. Not just sleep where you lay there and hear what's going on like it's far away, but deep, hard sleep. I have been draining a lot and I ate some, then slept some more. Maybe tomorrow will be worse, but so far (knock on wood) this is not as bad as I was expecting.

First Chemo

This was a day I'd been both looking forward to and dreading at the same time. As of this evening, I can say that it wasn't too bad and I was even pleasantly surprised by several elements of my first chemo treatment.

I had to be weighed before starting the process today, and the tech who was doing this offered to take my purse, which was a "Life is Good" bookbag. Then I showed him that it contained all my bile bags and tubes, so it stayed with me while I was weighed. They put the IV into my arm, a few inches above my wrist. They had to do a lot of vein-tapping and even use a hot pad to find a vein. I guess my veins are not what they used to be.

The first surprise was the comfy recliner treatment chair. I haven't been comfortable (or pain-free) for very long in any chair or bed without lots of adjustments to make my back feel better. I even brought my pillow for my back, just in case, which I didn't need. The room where my treament was had about 15 chairs. When I walked in, there was one empty chair just waiting for me. There were lots of ladies in scarves, and I was seated by two ladies that informed me I wouldn't need my book because I was in the party section. They also suggested a patch that has helped their back pain, which I got samples of and I can't wait to try. I may have other ailments, but hopefully this will get rid of the back pain.

The next surprise of the day was the people. These ladies were right, I was in the party section. They loved to talk and I realized every person in that room has a story to share about their cancer and treatment. They were mostly older than me. The lady next to me held my hand and massaged my arm. When she left, she gave me her phone number. I hadn't thought about lunch, but these women were pulling out snacks left and right. One lady shared her red cherries with me which were so good, and another shared her granola bars. Another lady had a whole ice chest of food. David brought me lunch, but these ladies kept me snacking until I had lunch. I actually think I ate more being there than I do in a normal day. We passed the time by talking and snacking and by the time I left that room, I felt like I had a whole new set of friends.

I learned a few things while I was there from the nurse and patients. I got information about ordering wigs and scarves. The ladies said wigs are expensive and uncomfortable and that scarves are the way to go. Because of my low-dose chemo, it may take three weeks instead of two, but the nurse says I will lose all my hair. I'm hoping to keep my eyebrows and lashes, but there's no way to predict if that will work out for me, we'll just have to wait and see. The nurse also said that I will have flu-like symptoms tomorrow like aches, vomitting, and fever. I told her I have nauseau medication, but she said even with the meds, I will probably be sick tomorrow.

I am scheduled to do this again next Thursday, assuming my white and red blood counts are good. I was worried about having another treatment again in just one week when most of the other patients only come every two or three weeks. Joyce sitting next to me said, "An IV once a week is nothing, you can do that." I think she's right; I can do this.

Anxiously Awaiting Treatment

The first good news of the day is that I got a really cute haircut. How to manage my hair with this illness has been a concern for me, but Lisa (who is Lori Johnson's sister and visiting from Utah) dropped everything to cut my hair. This was so nice because she came to my home and on my schedule. She cut it yesterday, but by the time she finished, I was so tired I had to lay down and I never got it styled. I had enough energy to fix it today, and even snap a photo to share with you all. Who knows what the next weeks will bring for my hair, but today, it's cute and I'm happy with it.

The next good news is that I got a call from Dr. Abrass and I am scheduled for my first chemo treatment tomorrow at 10:40 in Reno. I have a lot of questions, but pretty much all I know is that it will be administered by IV drip and it is a 4-hour appointment. I am also scheduled for the second chemo treatment one week from tomorrow. I didn't get a satisfactory answer to my question of what I should expect in the way of post-chemo sickness, but I guess I'll get my own answer soon enough. I've heard of people who sail through relatively easily and of some who are really sick. I don't know the specifics of what I'm in for, but I do know this is the only way I have to attack the cancer. I'm eating and resting today in preparation for tomorrow. Thanks for the love and prayers!

Bili Count Update

The lab called me to let me know that my bili count was a 7.3. That is up 0.2 from the last hospital test, despite all the fluid that I've been draining over the past few days. That is not what I'd hoped, David thinks it has something to do with the IV fluids I was on in the hospital. Oh well, I still have the green light for chemo on Thursday.

Bili Count

I felt a lot better today and I was not in so much pain. I talked to Dr. Abrass today. He has been on vacation, so he asked how the new drains were working. When I told him my how my bili count dropped from 10.8 to 8.0 to 7.1, and that these new drains are still draining, he told me to get in to the lab to have my count checked! I have been so curious to find out what it is, because I'm sure it has dropped. I arrived a little after 2:00, but it was busy and by the time I got my blood drawn, it was about 3:00. I often get the results the same day, but the lab closed at 7:00 p.m. and I still had no word about my count. So I will anxiously wait until morning and hopefully hear what it is early in the day. As soon as I find out, I'll post it here.

Dr. Abrass also said that I will have another count check on Wednesday and that I will start chemo on Thursday! I've been wanting to start treatment, but now that I have a day to start, I'm pretty nervous about it. I'm not really sure what to expect. If I knew what was coming, I don't know if that would make it better or worse, so maybe ignorance really is bliss. I have a million questions about all the details, but not a lot of answers yet. I know I need the treatment and I'm glad to finally be starting with something to make this better.

Draining

Today I have been draining tons from my left side. I have also had a lot of pain on that side, maybe from the rapid drainage. I stayed on my pain meds, but it didn't take the pain away. But if that's what it takes to get my bili count down, then it's worth it. I spent a lot of the day laying down and staying off my feet.

My appetite was better today. I have been eating and drinking Ensures or Enlive juices a couple of times a day. I feel like I'm stronger, so I'm happy about that. Also, I can see that the whites of my eyes are white, not yellow. So I hope I'm making progress. I'll call Dr. Abrass Monday to see what appointments I have this week.

Life is Good

I am so happy to report that I have had another quiet day. I slept well and the pain in my ribs is getting better. I spent a little time outside today watering my flowers. I have been eating better and enjoying some food and my high-calorie drinks. I have one little situation however; when I stand up my feet swell up like balloons. It is the weirdest thing, it only takes about five minutes of being on my feet before they start swelling. It is just my feet, from the ankles down. If anyone has any suggestions for me (besides staying off my feet and putting my feet up, which is what I'm doing) I'd love to have you "comment" me about it.

The right side of my liver is draining like crazy. I had a bag half full, emptied it, and within 30 minutes, it was a quarter full again! For those of you who don't know the average rate of liver drainage, that is really fast compared to what I have been doing over the past few weeks. I don't have another bili count until Wednesday, and I'm anxious to see what it is.

I am so happy to be home and to have such wonderful people supporting my family and me in this illness. Thank you and have a wonderful 4th of July!

Quiet Day

Today has been quite uneventful, which is something to be grateful for. I was able to be up most of the day. It was a nice change of scenery to not be in bed all day. I took a nap for a few hours this afternoon, but other than that, I was up and out of bed.

There is not much to report, we are looking forward to a quiet Fourth of July. I don't know that we will watch fireworks, but David will cook something on the grill and we'll have a chance to appreciate our country's freedom. We have a lot in our lives to appreciate right now. I am so thankful for my family and friends who are looking out for me. When I came home from the hospital yesterday, there were some of the high-calorie juices like I had in the hospital here waiting for me. Someone else brought by some protein powder drink mixes to help me get the nutrition and calories that I really need, especially if I am starting treatment soon. Thank you all for watching out for me and helping my family through all of this!

Home Again

I had a good night last night, one of the best in a while. They took my blood early this morning for another bili count and it was a 7.0 today!! That is the lowest it's been since my diagnosis, so we were all really happy about that.

I am still in some pain today and I don't have much of an appetite. But medically, things are going well and we were discharged from the hospital. Hadley picked us up at the airport and we came home to a clean house and I was even able to get a little nap.

As of right now, the doctor's plan is to start me on chemo next week. They suspect this drainage is as good as it's going to get and they say I can handle some treatment. I don't have any specifics yet. I have an appointment next week, so I plan to just eat, drain, and rest up for my treatments.

Thank you for the prayers, I'm convinced this is an answer to many specific prayers on my behalf and I can't tell you how much I appreciate it.

More good news

My bili count was 8.0 today - a whopping 2.1 points lower in just 24 hours! Because of this signigficant drop, they did not have to do any adjustments to my stents. The medical team here has a reasonable expectation that my bili count will still drop some more, we'll have to wait and see.

I had a good night. I had to get up twice in the night, and even though I needed David's help, I didn't have to mentally prepare myself for the pain that comes with movement. They are going to keep me here today and watch me and if all goes well, I will be released tomorrow. Then I'll go see Dr. Abrass in Reno after the weekend and determine my next step.

Today's Surgery

First, may I say that the airplane travel to Oakland is the way to go! Soon after we got settled into our cushy leather seats, I told David I thought we were flying kind of low. He said we were landing. It only took about 35 minutes! We felt like we were in very good hands with the Freys. It was so much nicer than driving. We had a Lincoln Continental waiting for us and no traffic, so we actually arrived at the hospital early.

My bili count was 10.1 before the surgery this morning. I went in to surgery at 11:00. I now have three drains instead of two, one on my right side and two on my left side. The new one on the left side is a little sore and cramping but the others feel good with no pain. These new drains have little holes on the inside to help them drain better. They will check these in the morning and see how they are working. If they are not draining very much by morning, they may go back in and make an adjustment. David was watching and thought the old drain was draining a lot, but we'll see what my bili count is tomorrow.

I arrived in my room at 1:50, after just 40 minutes in recovery, where I promptly went to sleep until 5:00. When I woke up I was hungry. They brought me some unidentifiable dinner, but David went out and found some pasta for me that was really good. The hospital brought me some Enlive juices that are 250 calories each that I am going to try to find at home. So now I just wait until 4:30 a.m.when they will come check my bili count.

We really want to thank everyone for fasting and praying for us. This surgery went as well or better than the doctors hoped. David especially feels that one direct blessing from the fasting was that the recovery was not as long or painful as we expected. Thank you so much for helping us through this ordeal and supporting us with your love, fasting, and prayers.

Quick Update

The surgery looks like it was successful - the doctors found a spot in the liver where the bile wasn't draining and there is now a bili tube there! We'll have more info later, but it looks good so far.

Comfort

I made it to church today! I went to Sacrament meeting, which goes from 9:00 - 10:10. At about 9:45 I was worried I wouldn't be able to finish the meeting, but I made it and I hope to be able to go again. I really enjoyed the talks; they were really comforting and it felt like every talk was written just for me. I felt strengthened by being at church. The rest of the day was nice, I got a little nap and then had a visitor. We walked to my mother-in-law's house and sat under the tree and enjoyed the breeze.

I am ready to go to San Francisco. I have been having this odd wake-me-up pain in my ribs and I am hoping the doctors can tell what's wrong with that bili tube. It's not really draining and we think it's blocked, which may be what's causing the pain. I feel peaceful and hopeful about this trip. Maybe a little scared, but not really. I know the doctors will do everything they can and I hope it works. If it doesn't, we'll cross that bridge when we come to it. Thank you all so much for the fasting and prayers. It has been so humbling and comforting to me to have your support. At this point, we are going on hope and prayers. I know we will get through whatever comes our way.

Surgery is at 9:30 Monday morning. As soon as we're able, we'll get something posted about it.

Faith and Prayers

I have been talking to my friends about faith and this is a letter that they wanted to share with you.


Dear Blog Readers,

I’m sure you all feel much like we do as you read this blog every day. We all love Sheri and her family and want to do more. It is a desperate and helpless feeling to watch someone so full of life suffer and be debilitated by sickness. Like you, we have prayed and hoped things would turn around, but we haven’t seen real improvement in Sheri’s condition. It has gotten us thinking about faith and prayer and what we know to be true and what more we can do. As Sheri’s family and friends, we are many religions, but we have noticed one thing we all have in common: we are all praying for her. We’d like to suggest we unite our faith and prayers in a specific way in Sheri’s behalf.

As the Bible teaches in James 2:17, “Even so, faith, if it hath not works, is dead, being alone.” We all have a lot of faith, and have offered many prayers, but maybe we can combine it with some works. In thinking about faith, there is a passage in the Bible that applies to how we feel about Sheri. In chapter 17 of Matthew, there is a man who comes to Jesus Christ asking Him to heal his son. His son is vexed with a devil. This man has already taken his son to the disciples who could not cure him. After Jesus heals his son and casts out the devil, the disciples asked Jesus why they could not cast out the devil. Jesus teaches the disciples about faith: “If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonderplace; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you.” Then the next verse says, “Howbeit this kind goeth not out but by prayer and fasting.” (Matt. 17:20-21)

We invite any of you who would like to join us in fasting and praying for Sheri on Sunday, June 28. There are many things we can pray for, but with her surgery approaching on Monday, I would suggest we pray specifically that Sheri’s surgery be successful so that her bilirubin count will come down and she can start treatment. Fasting is to voluntarily go without food or drink for a certain period of time, such as two meals (breakfast and lunch). You can begin your fast with a prayer, go without food or drink during the time of your fast, then break your fast with a prayer and a meal. When combined with sincere prayer, fasting can give added strength to those in need of blessings. In the Bible, Isaiah also talks about fasting in chapter 58:8, which says in part: “Then shall thy light break forth as the morning, and thine health shall spring forth speedily: and thy righteousness shall go before thee; the glory of the Lord shall be thy rereward.” (Italics added).

We have both fasted and prayed many times and have seen small miracles take place in our own lives. We want so much to help the Faughts in this difficult time. Perhaps her situation is like the family in the book of Matthew that needed fasting as well as prayer. Please join us in this effort on Sunday, before Sheri’s surgery. Thank you for your faith and prayers.

Sincerely,
Anne Hyde and Julie Stockard

Moving Forward

I wish I could say I had a perfect night’s sleep with my new pain patch; but the truth is I spent the night dealing with quite a bit of pain in my left side where the tube is inserted. Every time I moved or got up it sent another wave to remind me it was there. David got up and went to work this morning and I stayed in bed for a while.

Shortly after I decided I had just enough energy to get myself out of bed, my dear friend from Fernley called. I was still in pain and the hard night had made my voice somewhat stressed. She picked right up on that. Without hesitation she jumped in the shower then on the road to get to my side as soon as possible. She played nurse maid tirelessly until 3pm. I know God is watching over me because he has sent me friends such as this.

About noon I started feeling better and ate a good breakfast complete with the required Ensure. I had several visitors throughout the day and felt strong enough to get some more food down in the afternoon. I mixed an Ensure with a supplement David’s Mom found for cancer patients, creating a 600-calorie “power” drink. It wasn’t too bad and seemed to go down pretty well. If I could get three of those concoctions down a day, I would be set!

The call came in from San Francisco. I have a 9:30am appointment on Monday. They feel strongly that the benefits of the additional stent will outweigh the risks of complications. Joe Frey has offered to fly us to Oakland, where a car will be waiting to take me right to the hospital. All I need is a red carpet.

David and I have come to the conclusion that we will hit a wall if we do nothing. Moving forward is our only option. So, we are going to do our part…put our trust in the doctors to do their part…and lean heavily on the Lord to do His part.

Waiting...or Not?

I had my appointment with Dr. Abrass today. He worried the trip had been unnecessary since my bilirubin levels were too high and there is really nothing he can do yet. That left David and I with the question of “What do we do now?” He advised us that I just have to wait. He wanted me to see how things went over the next 3 weeks then call the center in San Francisco. “Wait” was really not what we wanted to hear. He did prescribe the pain patch so I hope that helps me get more comfortable.

We made the trip home pondering the immediate future. Just as we pulled into the garage, I got a call from San Francisco. They had weighed the risks of more procedures against waiting to see if the bilirubin levels will eventually come down. Dr. Warren now recommends action. Despite the high possibility of complications and the pain involved, they want to put in a third stent on Monday. I would be able to come home again on Tuesday if all goes well. I will get a call tomorrow to let me know what time they want me there on Monday.

David and I are now balancing the positives and negatives of proceeding down this path. We have some sincere praying to do and major decisions to make over the weekend.

Taking a Deep Breath

Should I start with the bad news or the good news? Ok, we'll get the bad news over with first. I had my blood drawn and tested today. My bilirubin level has gone up to a 10.7. I had hoped the drains were helping but it seems they are not doing the job. That level is way too high to start chemo. There is talk of giving me a Sentinel patch to manage the pain and to improve “quality of life.” I’m not quite sure “pain management” and “quality of life” belong in the same sentence.

I have an appointment with Dr. Abrass in Reno tomorrow. We will see what he recommends. Today I feel frustrated but I’m trying hard not to give up hope. I’m not sure what God’s plans are for me and am a little confused at this point. However, I’m not quite done praying for miracles.

Better news. I was able to meet my goal to drink 3 entire Ensures today and I’m not nearly as nauseous recently. I have been able to consume (and keep) additional calories so I am hoping for a little bit of weight gain. I have slightly more energy as I eat more but am still so fatigued by all the things I used to take for granted -- like taking a shower or getting dressed. My mom stayed for a couple days and was really helpful. I now have clean laundry, vacuumed floors, and spotless bathrooms. Thanks, Mom!

Focusing on Food

Oh boy. Kind of a rough patch. I was sick and had chills for most of the night. I finally fell asleep early this morning. I think I'm just not getting enough calories to fuel this fight.

I called my oncologist to see about the possibility of getting a PIC line to help me get more nutrients. I scheduled an appointment for Thursday, but he was out of the office so I called Dr. Warren’s office in San Francisco. His nurse practitioner told me the line would be a bad idea with too many possible complications. She wants me to just “keep eating”. Ok…that sounds easier than it is. I am trying to consume at least 3 Ensures each day and eating small meals often. Successfully keeping everything down is sketchy at best.

My mom is here helping me today. I’m not quite so sick this evening and will try to eat enough of her meatloaf to get some extra calories in me. I’m hoping for a better night.

Summer Morning

I was up at a quarter to 6 this morning to greet the day. I slipped outside to deadhead my roses and water some plants. I came in and treated myself to a little breakfast. It felt good to be out of bed...but by 7 I was ready for a nap! Later I had enough energy to take a shower and get spiffed up a bit. That was a fortunate thing because I had lots of visitors during the day.

I'm exhausted this evening and longing for a good night's sleep. I am having a hard time finding comfortable positions for my bones. But there's good news too. My bili tubes do seem to be draining better. I am hoping it is enough to make some progress with treatments. I even managed to eat TWO cashews today. Yeah!

San Francisco - Day 3

We are home now, but here's an update from our third day in San Francisco. They took my blood early Friday morning and my bili count was an 8.6. I had been fasitng and I was really weak and sick and not able to eat. There was a chance I would get another bili tube put in to help with the draining, but Dr. Warren decided that it is too risky to put in another bili tube in that part of my liver.

David discussed with them our need to begin treatment which may require us to take a few risks. But the doctor said that there was a chance of internal bleeding and infection if they added teh new tube. Either of these could require an extended hospital stay and it would be very painful for me with the way the new tube would need to be positioned. They talked a lot about my quality of life. I don't really think that eating, sleeping and feeling sick is a great way to spend my life, but it is better than being in the hospital for weeks on end. So, we are hoping the new positioning of my original two drains will help get my count down. We will wait for three weeks. I will get my bloodwork done on Wednesdays in the meantime.

We started the drive home late. We got in at 1:00 a.m. on Saturday. I am trying to do more than sleep and eat, but that's about all I could do on Saturday because I felt so nauseous. It's a little discouraging, but I realize that it could be worse. I'm glad to be home and hoping for some good progress with my bili tubes.

San Francisco - Day 2

Here' s a quick update on my day. I slept well last night, until they came in at 1:00 a.m. to check my vitals, then I went right back to sleep, which was nice. I did way better than David who was on the cot. I told him to go do something today, but he said he has all kinds of time to be out in the fresh air and he wants to be with me in this hospital.

My bili count was at 9 this morning, which is not much of a drop. The left drain is draining well, but the right one isn't draining as much. I am scheduled to have blood work at 4:00 a.m. tomorrow. They will check my bili count and if there is significant improvement (I'm not sure how many points would be considered significant) I think I'll be released to go home. If there is not significant improvement, I have an 8:00 a.m. appointment to get a new drain put in to help get my bili count down.

That's all I have for tonight, and if I don't post tomorrow, it may be because I am recovering from getting a new drain put in. I'll get the information out as soon as I'm able.

San Francisco - Day 1

We are here in San Francisco and we got blood work done this morning. My count was a 9.3. We met with the doctors this morning and they were in agreement that we need the radiologist to figure out why these stents are not draining to get my bilirubin count down. We left the hospital at about 11:00 a.m. and had to be back at 3:30 to meet with the radiologist, and I had to keep fasting. During this time, we drove to Fisherman's Wharf. I stayed in the car with the sunroof open, and since David was not fasting, he got soup and a sandwich and an ice cream from the candy store.

When we got back to the hospital, which is a different hospital from last time, but still in the same network of hospitals, to my surprise, I recognized the radiologist from the first SF hospital. I know he remembered me and all of my questions, because during our appointment, he asked me to give him the short version instead of the 20 minutes of information I wanted to share with him. They decided to relocate these tubes and do the contrasting again, which was very painful for me the first time. I asked to be heavily sedated and he said no because it won't hurt, and it would make my recovery much easier if I didn't have the extra drugs. During the procedure, I overheard the radiologist who, by the way, can't be over 30, tell another doctor something about my bile ducts. I said, "I'm sorry, what did you say?" I think that took him by surprise, but that's what you get when you recommend fewer drugs. He went on to explain that I have no bile ducts draining on my left side at all because the tumors are too obtrusive. The doctor cut my stitches, moved my bili tube, and stitched me up again. So far, it is draining a lot, but it looks like water. We'll see what they say about that in the morning.

I feel like I am getting some questions answered, especially one that I have been afraid to ask, about how quickly the cancer is growing. Dr. Warren says it is a slow-growing cancer and that we have a window of opportunity. I was relieved to hear that, but it's still a lot of cancer to take care of. Dr. Warren says I have been the topic of the round table discussions all day and will continue to be tomorrow. Everyone is trying to see what they can do for me, and we will discuss some options tomorrow. All of this celebrity didn't result in me getting a better room however; the room is small and the bed is not very comfortable. David is on a tiny cot that is as hard as a rock. I told him he should go back to the hotel, but he is staying with me and I am glad for that.

After the procedure was done and I had the green light to eat, all I could think about was that chicken salad sandwich David had earlier at Fisherman's Wharf. The nurse suggested a closer place, but I'd been thinking about that sandwich since lunchtime. David got it for me and it was delicious. I also enjoyed some treats from the candy shop, and I was told today that I am under strict orders to eat whatever sounds good to me. The only thing that is off-limits to me is alcohol, which is fine with me. Otherwise, I can eat whatever I want.

Before I close, there are so many of you I'd like to thank. It was such a boost to have Milray come help out last weekend. I know there are many of you helping with my kids while we are gone. Thank you so much!! It is really a relief to know our kids are being watched over and loved in our absence. I appreciate all your help and love and prayers.

Change of Plans

I got a call today from the nurse practitioner at the cancer center in San Francisco. She said that Dr. Warren says that after looking at my information, he thinks my tumors are too out of control and he can't do a liver resection on me. He said it would be too risky and it wouldn't work. At least not until I've had chemo to shrink them.

I reminded her that I can't have chemo until my bilirubin count is down. I asked my questions and she called me back after she'd talked to the doctor again. I reminded her that I am just in a holding pattern, waiting for someone who can do something.

So now we have a new plan: David and I are driving to San Francisco tonight so that we can be there first thing in the morning. We will get my bloodwork done in the morning and then get to our appointment with both Dr. Coe (oncologist) and Dr. Warren (surgeon) at 9:30. It is likely that they will want to re-do my stents. That means that I am packing for the weekend. It is likely I will be there until Saturday. I will report more information when I have it.

Hope

We are getting ready to go to San Francisco on Wednesday. We considered leaving on Tuesday because it is so hard on me to drive. I just can't stay in the same position for very long before I get uncomfortable and very sore. I have to keep moving and that is hard to do on a road trip. We have been so blessed to have friends who are tuned in to our every need. We have someone willing to fly us over from Fallon to Oakland, where we will get a car and drive to our appointment. We don't have to leave Tuesday and that will make the trip so much easier! We will meet with the surgeon and we are hoping for good news. Good news would be that they say they can resect my liver (take part out so it can grow back). They wouldn't do it at this appointment, but I am packing a bag just in case -- you never know. If we do not get the news we are looking for, we will see what other aggressive options are available.

I met today with a friend of a friend who is a spokesperson for a cancer center. This man is a two-time cancer survivor who gave me the advice that you have to be your own advocate in the treatment process. He gave me some good suggestions on how to proceed in my treatment. I will also be getting in touch with a relative of a different friend who had the same thing as me, secondary liver cancer, where they couldn't find the primary cancer and it turned out to be primary bile duct cancer, just like me. He also had the high biliruben that wouldn't come down. He had a liver resection and then chemo and was able to have a good quality of life for quite a few years. I was encouraged to hear of these stories - they give me hope for what is ahead in my life. I am excited to meet with the surgeon in San Francisco and hope there is something they can do. If not, I will have to be my own advocate for more aggressive treament because I want to get going on this and get on with my life.

None of us ever know what surprises life will hand out. I never would have written this into the script of my life. This doesn't feel like the life I'm used to. I keep hoping I will wake up from this bad dream, but I'm pretty sure I won't. I guess this is the new definition of my life, where I hope to eat and not feel sick, sleep and stay comfortable, and have the energy to get a shower before I need to rest during the day. My wardrobe has completely changed, I now look for clothes with stretchy waists that can hide bile bags. I can't say that I wouldn't take my old life back if I had the chance, but I am learning a lot from this new life. However unexpected this turn of events is for me, this is my life at the moment and I am doing my best to learn and grow from it but not be overwhelmed by it. I can't say enough how grateful I am for my family and friends who are making this so much easier to handle. I appreciate your love, kindness, prayers, and willingness to help with things I am unable to do right now. Wish me luck in San Francisco!

Food and Flowers

There's not much to tell, but here's a little update on my progress. Thursday night, for the first time since my cancer diagnosis, I slept deeply enough to dream. It was nice to be in a deep sleep, and I hoped maybe I wouldn't need a nap on Friday, but not so; I was still tired enough Friday afternoon that I took a little nap.

Milray made a great dinner here, and I ate some and drank some Ensure, adding another whopping 600 calories to my dinner intake. As much as I have tried to avoid it, I was so nauseous that I felt like I might vomit. I have worried about the possibility of vomitting with these stents in me becuase it seems like it would really hurt and common sense tells me I should avoid it if at all possible. However, it wasn't possible and I ended up vomitting. Suprisingly, it didn't hurt as bad as I anticipated, and it may have been helpful because the bile bag from my stomach that never fills had to be drained twice after that. I lost all those calories, and I know I need them, but it wasn't as bad as I was expecting.

Today I am enjoying a little outside time watching my friends plant some flowers in pots for my yard. I have a homemade lasagna for my freezer and food for when my kids get home that they brought over. I have the best friends in the world! It's true, everyone is taking such good care of me and I appreciate it so much!

Quiet Day

I have felt pretty good today. Hadley and Logan left early this morning to go on the church Youth Conference Trek. They were pretty excited. They are supposed to be roughing it, (no phones!), so I will be excited to hear all about it when they get back on Saturday.

I ran some errands with my mother-in-law. I got the Wal-Mart shopping done, then had to send Sheryl into Raley's for me. I guess one store was all I could handle today. We are getting ready for my friend Milray to come tomorrow. She gets in at 10:30 a.m. and Alex is going to pick her up at the airport. Aside from that, I am just trying to be comfortable enough to get some rest in my unusually quiet house.